We don’t all agree about everything. It seems like such an obvious statement. So why do we sometimes get so angry about it? Why do we think others should change their minds when they hear our point of view? Is that what we would do?
Anger as the reaction to disagreement is unnecessary and it creates a negative energy that perpetuates exactly what we don’t want. Read that again. Anger, and its cousins, blame, judgment and resentment all foster more of the same. They don’t bring us any closer to what we really want…which is understanding and connection. Think about it.
We really have the wrong approach here. To get to understanding and to move forward in a meaningful way, we must suspend anger, blame, judgment and resentment and find some space to listen and recognize our common ground. We must really believe that different points of view will bring us to the best solution.
In this story, Abigail Disney and Robert Schenck have done just that. She is a liberal and pro-choice activist. He is an evangelical minister. Here is a quote by Robert from the story by Cassie Spodak: “People surprise you because they’re never as simple as you want them to be.”
I think we get angry about what is happening in the world, in our communities and in our family because we boil it down to black or white, for me or against me, this way or that way. We refuse to accept that NOTHING is ever that simple. We live in many shades of gray. We can make it beautiful by listening to understand and connecting in ways that make a difference.
If you didn’t listen to the story please take four minutes to watch this video. Let Abigail and Robert inspire you to “choose a better way to be in conflict”.
All is well
Paula
