You think you don’t have a choice…but you do. You think there isn’t any other way…but there is. Even if you feel boxed into a corner, all you have to do is turn around and look out away from the walls to see an open space.

Here’s the thing. We think there is no other choice because we are unwilling to make a change, unable to see beyond the current condition or afraid that something else won’t work out. Maybe it’s because someone told us it wouldn’t work or maybe we lack the confidence in our own self. There is always another choice. If you are not happy with the one you made to bring you to this moment, you simply have to make another choice.

“But Paula”, you say, “I HAVE to do this, I HAVE to be here or, I HAVE to show up. I have no choice about this, that or the other thing.” Well, yes you do. You have been lying to yourself. You always have a choice…sometimes not about what happens, but always about how you choose to engage in life. About how you go forward from this very moment now.

What’s missing is conscious choosing. Conscious choosing requires a pause to check in with yourself. Is this what I want? Is it who I want to be? Does it feel good and right and true? Does it get me what I want? And in a spiritual context…is it good for everybody?

We make choices all of the time. Big choices, little choices, serious choices, lighthearted choices. When we make conscious choices we live in alignment with our soul. There is a lot less whining and complaining and feeling the world has us by the tail. Instead…just the next best decision. And then the next.

That’s the other thing about choices…most are usually not the final choice. My dear friend Richard Levy used to say…Everything is cast in jello. That’s true about choices. You can’t undo them…but you can make another one.

Whew. I think it’s time for a nap! Good choice for a rainy day!
Much love
Paula

This is just a quick reminder: Life is short. That dash between the year you arrived and the year you will depart is just that…a dash. Life is short and nothing is permanent. We’re here and then we move on. Instead of avoiding this truth, what if we embraced it? What if we let it help us live more fully?

Let me stand on a solid rock, held securely by the earth, one that allows me to see a distance. I’ll call that rock ‘death’. Knowing with certainty that my body will eventually be gone, I can stand on this rock and use the wisdom that arises from knowing my mortality.

When I think about my own death as this solid rock of certainty upon which I stand…it helps me to live intentionally and with great appreciation. It helps me to make the best choices I can make. It helps me to slow down and notice beauty. It helps me to look upon the world more kindly, with a soft curiosity. It helps me to not judge myself so harshly.

Remembering that my body is temporary can open me up to living life more gently and with an appreciation for wherever I find myself at the moment. I am here. I am alive. What is possible today?

With much love
Paula

It is amazing how quickly frustration seeps in when I don’t understand something. How could this be happening?! I don’t understand! It’s supposed to work! I was feeling this way today when I couldn’t access the Spiritual Soul Center website. I contacted our host, got the directions and it still didn’t work for me. I tried many times, getting more frustrated each time. Why isn’t this working?!

Does this sound familiar to you? I felt myself descending into hell. Until I caught myself. Really, Paula…is this where you want to go? I set it aside and worked on something else. That simple. I stopped wrestling and set it aside.

I remembered…if you want to live freely, with a light heart and a joyfulness in your step…the answer many times is this: let-it-be. Let-it-be might mean sit for a while, walk away from it, stop wrestling, be still, chose a different story.

When I find myself in time of trouble Mother Mary comes to me, speaking words of wisdom, let it be. Remember this? From Lennon and McCartney? We gotta learn to let it be…accept that we are not in charge of anything. There is precious little in our control. Here are a few that come to mind.

Other people…no. What they say, do or believe…no. Who shows up…no. How they show up…no. How tall you are, the color of your hair, the size of your feet…no. The date of your death…ah, no. Logging onto a website using two factor authentication…well, for me that’s a no. This list could go on and on, but you get the point. We are in charge of next to nothing in the physical world. The good news…I can decide to let it be. I can choose let-it-be. I can control that. Letting it be is a great gift. In those moments of surrender, God is.

All is well, peace be still, let it be. Amen.
Paula

There is nothing better for you to do than to be you. Not a thing. The most important decision you can make is to live genuinely. What would you choose, what decision would you make, to be authentically you? And…how would you know?

How you feel is the best indicator of your authenticity. For me…I am being me…

• when I feel worthy no matter what other people say or do.
• when I feel joy and deep satisfaction about my choices.
• when I feel peaceful and at ease no matter what is circling around me.
• when I feel brave and forge my own path instead of following the crowd.
• when I feel humble because I know I am the same as every other living being.
• when I feel confident enough to let my feelings be what they are and not try to hide them or run from them.

I like this list of feelings…worthy, joyful, peaceful, at ease, brave, humble, confident. This is how I want to be…how I want to feel. I want to consciously engage in life from this place.

When we make conscious decisions with careful attention to how we feel, we are the closest to being our authentic self. So, remember to check in with how you feel…and go from there. Be you.

And please, always be kind.

Much love
Paula

I want to share this simple practice with you from Thich Nhat Hahn, from his book Be Free Where You Are.

In the exercise “Breathing in I smile,” you may ask: Why should I smile when there is no joy in me? The answer to that is: Smiling is a practice. There are over three hundred muscles in your face. When you are angry or fearful, these muscles tense up. The tension in these muscles creates a feeling of hardness. If you know how to breathe in and produce a smile, however, the tension will disappear – it is what I call “mouth yoga”. Make smiling an exercise. Just breathe in and smile – the tension will disappear and you will feel much better.

What could be more wonderful than this? What could be more simple? Breathe and smile. That’s it.

Even behind the mask.
Much love
Paula

This week marks the twentieth anniversary of 9/11. That’s all we have to say…two numbers…and we know what it means and how it felt. Those of us who are old enough to remember…and those of us who were directly impacted no matter the age…we remember and we feel the enormity of that experience. The world felt it. You could tell. Everything seemed to stop. Like this great big pause. The unfathomable-ness of it.

It’s hard to believe it has been twenty years. There is an entire generation that has no direct experience of that day. Kind of like me and the Vietnam War. I had an idea but not the full experience of it. I was too young. I guess every generation has its gut punch. That’s becoming more obvious to me. The corollary is that the longer you live, the more punches you get. Sigh.

I was watching a limited series this week about 9/11. Twenty years later there is a lot of context available that was missing from my original experience. Historical perspective I guess you’d say. It changes the way I see the whole event…it widens my view. But you know what hasn’t changed? The sadness I feel about that day. The sadness I feel about the pain, anguish and loss. I am carrying sadness…still. Tears rolled down my face as I watched the towers hit and people jump and run and cry out.

I’ve decided this sadness is useful. It reminds me that I am part of a bigger whole. It reminds me that I am connected at a soul level to every other soul. That I can feel the other as if we are one. For this I am grateful and humbled…even in my sadness.

With much love
Paula

Every single day, lives are changed forever by tragedy of every kind. In an instant life is turned sideways and nothing will ever be the same.

Natural disasters – wind, fire, rain, earthquakes.
Collapses – buildings, bridges, scaffolding, ladders, businesses.
Human tragedies – violence, war, famine, abuse.
Disease and diagnoses – too many to name.
Emergencies – stroke, heart attack, aneurism.
Accidents – car crash, drug overdose, fall.
Loss – anything and everything that brings on grief and pain.

This past week has been no different than many other weeks of our life. And next week will bring more of the same. What can we do? So much heartache and suffering. I feel sad. It hurts to suffer and to watch suffering. I know because I have been in both places…I bet you have too.

When we aren’t the ones in the crosshairs, we have a crucial role to play. It is this – to not let ourselves be dragged into suffering with others, but instead to be the joy and the light that offers hope. That is what will lift us up, all of us.

We can feel empathy, we can imagine the pain and sorrow. And then our work is to breathe deeply and imagine love and wholeness rising in those who are suffering at this very moment now. To envision comfort and ease and every good thing. To pray, meditate and love.

Listen…the greatest power in the world is love. Let’s use it! Use it now. Are you doubtful? How could it possibly work? Just this question…have you ever really tried it?

With great trust in God that is Love Itself.
Paula

Many times I have used this to explain the way we show up in the world: We either come from fear or from love. Then, in an almost insignificant moment that became a huge ‘AHA’ for me, I questioned the truth of this statement. Here is what happened.

I was gathered with my Soul Center tribe on our Mid-Week Connection Zoom call. We were taking about love…how love is all there is. How love is the one power in the universe…that’s it, nothing else. No competition from any other power. And Maggie, my dear friend, fellow seeker and ponder-er of life says this – If love is all there is, why is it we say we either come from fear or from love? Seems like we could only come from love.

Well, mind blown for me. I was struck by this simplicity and depth. Maybe it seems obvious to you, but to me it is still a big deal. We do not come from fear. Ever. We are always coming from Love because Love is what we are, the One Source of All-That-Is. So, what happens when we feel fearful? When we act in any way that looks like less than Love?

Fear is a construct in the human mind. It’s not a real thing. We can feel fear. We can feel afraid and anxious and exhausted and depressed. But we can only BE love. That is the only real thing…LOVE.

A Course in Miracles says – Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing unreal exists. Herein lies the peace of God.

Herein lies the understanding of our true nature and the true nature of God. Love is all there is.

Still pondering, still learning.
Calm mind, grateful heart, joyful soul.
Paula

I was remembering this quote from Mark Nepo: life takes time to live. That feels right to me. Not all of life is squeezed into any one time period. It takes time to grieve, to grow, to understand, to experience. I believe life gets richer over time. Not always in ways we prefer. Maybe there is more clarity or more doubt. Maybe there is a greater ease and trust, or more confusion. Life just takes time to live.

The paradox is, that all living happens in the exact moment now. The fullness of being alive happens in the moment. It can’t be any other way. It is only possible to be here now. That’s the only choice. My mother used to say…if you want to know where you are, look around and there you are. And if you want to know what the weather is…open up the door and stick your head out. She understood…be here now.

So, what’s my point? I think it’s this – life unfolds in the moment. Life unfolds. To me it feels like a manuscript being opened one page at a time. It feels holy and I am filled with hope and great anticipation. Life, unfolding, all the way through, in each moment, over time, until the book is finished.

Life takes time to live + be here now.
Life unfolds.
Let it be.

Much love
Paula

What if there really wasn’t any place you had to be? Really. When you catch yourself thinking, well, I have to be…just stop for a minute. You don’t “have to” anything. Usually what we mean when we say “I have to be…” is that there will be consequences and results from the choice we make.

“Have to be…” comes across as someone else forcing you to do something or to be a certain way. Not so. There is absolutely nothing you have to do or have to be. It is always your choice. You are the one who has to deal with the consequences or the result of that choice. That’s what makes it seem like “have to.”

So stop whining about all the stuff you have to do and all of the ways you have to be. It’s not true. Make the best choice, a conscious choice, from your heart…and you will experience the benefit of your decision. And let other people do the same thing.

Much love
Paula