You have been a long time in the making. Think about that for a moment. Your entire life is culminated in now. All of your experiences, choices, relationships, beliefs, efforts, successes and failures…all of it has shaped you. You might notice that living takes time…the evolution of a life takes time.

I think that evolution comes out of moments of awareness. The question is…what will I do with my awareness? Rant, resist, complain?  Look for someone to blame? Those are too easy – they take minimal effort. What if I use my awareness to become curious, inspired, trusting? What if I look inward?

Jesus said we could move mountains…but he didn’t say how long it would take…just that we could do it. I used to picture that mountain disappearing in an instant and appearing in a different place in the next instant. Now I picture myself with a shovel and a wheelbarrow. He also said anything is possible to those who believe in possibility. He didn’t say how soon the new possibility would show up. I used to focus on making things happen in my life according to my personal time table. Now I trust in the Infinite Intelligence in the Universe and that is enough.

The evolution of a life takes time. Awareness opens up possibility. There is still work to do. On my best days I am happy to push that wheelbarrow.

Much love.
Paula

The Grinch was born with a heart two sizes too small. Well, no wonder he’s so grumpy. For most of us it can be a challenge to stay happy with a regular sized heart! But in this popular story his heart grows. How?

Well, Cindy Lou Who certainly plays a role. She was not to be thrown off her Christmas ideal by the Grinch’s grumpiness. But what made his heart grow three sizes on that fateful day? He felt something. He felt a shift in himself. He looked at the Whos in Whoville celebrating without one single present or one morsel of food for their Christmas feast. He began to FEEL the spirit of the Whos in Whoville. Once he began to feel the intensity of caring and the spirit of joy…his heart did what hearts do. It expanded. And once expanded, once opened up…well, love poured out.

My Christmas wish is that you feel the spirit of this season…the season of light and love and caring. That you feel it to the depth of your heart and soul…so much so that your heart expands and the warmth it generates fills your life, your family, your community and beyond.

Merry Christmas
Paula

Who am I? Isn’t that the most exquisite and quintessential question we might contemplate? Well, for me it is. I don’t have a neat and complete answer…just a few ideas, meandering thoughts, really. Here goes.

I am a vessel for the expression of something far greater than me. A shell filled with Holy Spirit, Divine Essence, God Itself. My body is a way to be seen in the world, but I am more than my body. I am more than my changing thoughts and beliefs. Something about me is eternal and whole and perfect. Could this be my soul?

And if this is all true, wouldn’t it be best if my thinking self stepped aside? If I emptied myself of desire, self-importance and pretext…and allowed ‘that which is greater’ to carry me, guide me, fill me? What if I am here to simply learn how to be an empty vessel? To stop getting whipped into a frenzy by the seeming imbalance in the world and instead to stay curious and hopeful and…empty.

Jesus made it clear…everything from the Father through me. Everything through me…not by me or for me…but through me. God through me. Holy Spirit through me. Divine through me. Nothing less than this!

Paula, be the vessel. Be – the – vessel.

I don’t have enough time. There is too much to be done. I couldn’t possibly squeeze in one more thing. That’s what we think sometimes. But is it really true? What I know for sure is that I always make time for what is important.

So, I don’t need more time…I just need the desire to live what is essential. Every day. No matter what. And one thing that brings this into crystal clear focus is the experience of letting go of a beloved pet.

Tomorrow at 12:15pm, our beloved Buddha will make his way over that rainbow bridge. In one week he went from his happy, sweet, little-man self to sad, uncomfortable and hiding under the bed. After spending the night at the emergency vet hospital, and stealing the heart of Dr. Ruffner with his sweetness, he was diagnosed with lymphoma. Our sweet boy is letting us know he is ready to go. Our hearts are broken.

It’s like time stands still when you’re getting ready to say good-bye. Things that seemed to need attention right away no longer even register. So many things fall away. Tenderness feels overwhelming. Grief is hard. You know what? There is always enough time for what is important.

That’s all can bear to write today. Love you Buddha Buddha.
Paula

There is one answer. I don’t need the question…just the answer. This one answer will lead us out of greed, the need for power over others and the self-righteous desire for self-preservation above all else. That answer is compassion.

First, compassion towards self. Compassion towards self means to be healed of anything less than love. To root out and release all fear, hatred, anger, judgment and resentment and by doing so, to radiate God Itself. Then we might accept that we each are a temple of the Divine, humble and essential.

Having traveled the path this far, then we might be able to feel the needs of others…all others. This is compassion in its highest demonstration. To look toward others and notice their own struggle to align with love. To notice because we, too, have the same struggle…the struggle to see God in the midst of everything.

This is great and noble work. Life work, really. I believe there is no work more important than this: through compassion, to see God in the midst of everything. Each one of us is essential in this great unfolding.

Here is an excerpt from a blog by Martha Beck that applies here for me.

“My job today is to feel all the parts of me that are like the darkest parts of my profoundly divided country, my profoundly divided species. It is to listen to them, to understand them until my own fear, anger, and sorrow dissolve into the light of compassion.
I can only do this inside myself — but that will be enough. It will be enough because one healed person broadcasts an energy that can pull dozens, hundreds, millions of people out of their own darkness.“

I’m in.
Much love
Paula

Why isn’t it good enough to do good for the sake of doing good? Why the need for accolades and credit, awards and honors? I think it’s because we don’t feel good enough about our own self. We don’t accept that we matter. We need someone to tell us…sometimes over and over. We don’t think we make a difference unless we hear it from others. How crazy is that?

We give away our power and our joy when we wait. We hold anxiety…waiting and waiting to be recognized…by somebody…please!!!!

Listen, here’s the solution: simply do good to feel good. That’s it. Do your best to feel your best. If someone notices…well, fine. If no one notices, it doesn’t really matter. Sure it feels good to know we’ve made a difference, to get confirmation, to be recognized. But all of that is just a bonus. The real treasure is the feeling we have inside when we do good. That is so enough.

If you are feeling isolated and alone this holiday week…just do something good. Do it for someone else or do it for yourself. And then feel good. Right then. Gratitude will pour into your heart and no matter how different this holiday season looks, you my friend, can feel good.

Happy, happy day!
Much love
Paula

I was reading the news and ran across this…“And to Penn Jillette, it’s clear that Joe Biden now has “one job.” The 70 million-plus people who voted for Trump “are our neighbors and our relatives.” Biden must “fill all our hearts with love for each other” so we can “understand and move on together,”.

Really? That is the one job of the President of the United States of America? I think not. That’s not his job. He has many things to get done. But to expect that he fill our hearts with love for each other…well, that is impossible. He will certainly fail.

The only one to fill my heart with love is me. The only one to fill your heart with love is you. The responsibility for a heart filled with love lies squarely in each individual. No one outside of me can do that for me. Certainly leaders can inspire us by their words and actions in the direction of love or in the direction of fear. But NO ONE can fill our hearts with love. We each must take responsibility for that.

So my advice is simple…don’t wait for Joe Biden, or anyone else, to fill your heart with love. Really, don’t wait another minute to release any fear you have, any judgment or anxiety, and replace it with love. Don’t wait another minute to practice loving your ‘enemies’…and listening to them and finding common ground with them. Don’t wait. Plant some love in your heart right now.

This love I’m talking about shows up as kindness, compassion, respect, understanding and humility. Do you think this is wimpy kind of stuff? Well, just try it for a while. It will be one of the hardest things you will ever do! You’ve got to have courage to love in this way…to love those who would persecute you, bully you, call you names, talk down to you, tell you that you don’t matter. Your job is to put a little love in your own heart.

Kent M. Keith, in his book Anyway, The Paradoxical Commandments, puts it this way: “People are illogical, unreasonable and self-centered. Love them anyway.”

Indeed.
Paula

It may sound like an obvious kind of statement…but I like to choose how I spend my time. I mean, I like to consciously decide. So, I’ll admit right here that I have little tolerance for being the audience for people who talk non-stop about themselves and their stories. I am not here to be the audience. I don’t want that role. I want a pause now and then. I am perfectly fine with a little bit of quiet right in the middle of a conversation. I think it adds some richness. I also am not up for gossip or complaining or so much judgment.

So, I say ‘no’ to some things now. I am willing to engage to a point and then I can make a choice to walk away. I consciously decide to be the audience or not. At the same time my biggest work is to stay out of judgment. Not everyone wants what I want. I’ve got to let that be.

What I want is to be in relationship with others. To be in relationship is to have a connection. For me it works like this: I want to see you and I want to be seen. I want to hear you and I want to be heard. I want to be present to you and I want you to be present to me. I want connections that are meaningful and enriching. I’ve decided…this is what brings me joy…to know you and to be known.

Still practicing
Paula

What does it mean to have a prayer life? If you have one, you probably know that your particular way of praying is one of many. I think that most prayer starts with a dedicated time of contemplation, release or recitation. It can be about stillness or specific action. Overall, I believe it is an opening up to the wisdom within. It is getting out of thinking and into feeling.

Meditation, yoga, walking, sitting, kneeling, prostrate, eyes open, eyes closed, reciting prayer, chanting mantra, singing, face open to the sky, head bowed, words or no words. All of it is praying.

In our ‘Reaching for Joy – A Beading Meditation’ class this past Sunday, Jill said it helps her to pray by having something to hold onto. Creating a bracelet, holding each bead and infusing it with the energy of peace, ease, grace and love…to allow these to move through you. That is the gift of prayer…to let these move through you…and to offer those same things to others you hold in your mind and heart.

I’ve always loved the Unity teaching that prayer changes me. It allows me to see differently and more clearly. It lifts me. It creates an opening in me to feel the presence of God, of the Divine…and then to see that in all people and in all things, everywhere.

I think that is why Jesus is such a powerful teacher. When he felt conflicted or wanted to bring himself closer to God, he prayed. And so very often he saw God everywhere and in everyone.

That’s what I want.
Much love
Paula

Acknowledge that you missed the mark…and start again. Growing isn’t about getting it right all of the time. So much of what you have become has come out of the dark corners, the tough times, the setback and the failures. Missing the mark is just a place to start again.

Acknowledge that you missed the mark…and listen intently with curiosity to who might be calling you out. Is there some wisdom being shared that you need in order to get unstuck?

Acknowledge that you missed the mark…to yourself. Not so you can drown in self pity, but so that you can become a better you.

Everybody misses the mark. Maybe that is one of the intentions of this human experience…to have a chance to set ourselves right, to recover, to begin again. How else would you ever know how beautifully resilient you are? How amazingly strong? How tenderly humble?

How about just looking back over this single day and ask yourself…how did I miss the mark? Where was I not my best? And then decide to make an adjustment. That’s how you ‘fix’ missing the mark…you adjust your aim.

In this spiritual work we have to pay attention, pause to consider and then be humble with our new ‘aim’. Not to worry about missing the mark…I am certain we will have new opportunities quite often to aim again.

Much love
Paula