This video pops up to my attention every once in a while. And every time it does, I take those five minutes to listen. And not just listen, but to feel the powerful energy of this incredible moment. I take it in and it is exhilarating.

I figure someone else will benefit from it. Maybe you? So here it is. Nothing else to say.

Enjoy.
Paula

What is the most important feeling you could have today? No matter what happens, how life rolls out for you today…what feeling do you want to feel?

Do you ever even think about that?

Mostly we think about what we have to do. Everything we want to accomplish. There are the to-do lists and the appointments. The classes we signed up for and clients we have on the schedule. The commitments we’ve made and the dinners to be planned and then executed. Okay, I get it. I have this stuff, too.

But what if feelings came first? I think we can let feelings help direct our day instead of leaving them to chance. To do that, we’ve got to take a moment to name them, to be intentional about it. Here are a few examples.

I want to feel rested, useful, inspired, peaceful, healthy, at ease, confident, calm, carefree, connected. Pick one. Choose something not on this list. There are literally hundreds of options. Choose a feeling you want to feel today. Let that feeling help you decide what to do and how to be.

Why not give it a try?
Paula

So far, so good. Just that for today. It’s a kind of acceptance for where I find myself without so much judgment attached to it. Like so far, so good, I’m alive. I made it to this point. I might feel fragile, about to crumble but guess what? I’m here. So far, so good, even it doesn’t feel so good.

I’m talking about simple gratitude for being alive. I’m talking about wearing the feeling and attitude. Put on your super-hero cape that says, “So far, so good”.

How often do you credit yourself for making it this far? I mean look at your life. Look at the story of your life. Where you’ve come from, how you’ve grown, what you’ve accomplished, who you’ve become. What about: so far, so good?

Not perfect, without obstacles and frustrations and heartbreak. Not compared with anything or anyone else. Just, so far, so good. Go to the mirror and say it. Put your fist in the air. So far, so good.

For today.
Paula

On my Zen Calendar this week, Ram Dass shared this short story.

Imagine two waves, a smaller one and a larger one, traveling across the ocean. Suddenly, the larger one sees land approaching, and gets upset. He cries to the smaller wave, “Oh, no! Up ahead, waves are crashing and disappearing! We’re going to die!” The smaller wave, somehow, is unperturbed. So, the larger wave tries to convince her, to no avail.

Finally, the smaller wave says, “What would you say if I told you that there are six words, that if you really understood and believed them, you would see that there’s no reason to fear?” The bigger wave protests, but as the land approaches, he becomes desperate. He’ll try anything. “Fine, fine, tell me the six words.”

“Okay,” the smaller wave says, “You’re not a wave, you’re water.”

If only we believed.
Paula

I was riding in the backseat as we sped down the highway last week on our way to Oriental, NC for some rest and relaxation. I like traveling in the backseat. I was already relaxing, not having to drive or navigate. Nice!  This thought popped into my mind as I noticed a blur of colors in the median.

Wild flowers in the median don’t know we call them weeds.

Weeds….valueless plants growing wild. Really? Weeds? I don’t think so. I decided, right then and there, that no flower could be called a weed. Not the yellow dandelion, the wild purple violet, the field pansy, the common vetch or the carolina geranium. We call them weeds because they grow profusely where we don’t want them to grow. That’s on us. It’s not their fault.

This might be a good lesson for how we have a tendency to judge other people. We look at them and determine, through our own lens, they don’t have much value. Maybe it’s the person begging for money at the intersection, the man who smells like he hasn’t bathed in forever, the young girl with rotted teeth. Or it could be the person with whom we disagree or the one who doesn’t seem to care. We may not call them weeds, but maybe we don’t want them around either. Not really interested in their particular bloom. That’s on us. It’s not their fault.

I guess the bottom line here is: Don’t judge it, just let it bloom. We don’t have to fall in love with every flower or every person. But we don’t have to judge them either.

Thank you, wild flowers in the median.
Paula

I am less sure about things than I’ve ever been. Less sure, meaning that I don’t rely on what I already know as the absolute truth. Less sure, meaning everything I know today is subject to revision. It also means I don’t accept as true, every new thing I read or see.

I am more like…maybe or maybe not? I wonder? Not sure. Hmmm.

I feel more freedom. A lightness, not so much to carry around. Less anxiety, not so much to feel responsible for. I realize I am more comfortable in the space of not knowing. I don’t mind it like I used to and it doesn’t scare me as much either.

The space-of-not-knowing allows me to scramble around for a while instead of using my energy to hold it all together. Why was that ever important? Holding it all together? The don’t-let-em-see-you-sweat attitude? Why?

I am less sure of everything and I don’t mind one bit if you happen to see me sweat. I am done trying to hold it all together. I’d rather feel a bit lighter and less anxious. I’ll know when I know or I might never know. I’m okay with that.

Feeling lighter
Paula

Have you ever felt overwhelmed? Silly question, right? It happens. It happens when we are carried out of the present moment. Sometimes we get carried into the past with guilt, resentment or unforgiveness. More often we feel overwhelmed about the future with fear, anxiety or worry. It’s not fun feeling overwhelmed.

To quote Bob Dylan: There must be some kind of way outta here. I agree.

I’ve noticed when I just ‘do’ the moment, that overwhelming feeling dissipates. When I ‘do’ whatever the moment is calling for, I gain a bit more balance and ease. Just this…just ‘do’ this right here in front of me. That’s it. The next best step, best choice, highest thought, or kind action. The-very-next-one.

It takes practice to bring myself back to the moment. It does get easier with practice. After a while, ‘bringing myself back to the moment’ becomes the way I live. It becomes part of the fabric of my life. I notice myself straying and I bring myself back.

Less overwhelmed. More present. Best life.
Paula

Life is hard because we resist. We want something else. We don’t like it…not one bit. We don’t like what it means. We’re afraid of what might happen. We can’t fix it. It shouldn’t be this way. No one should have to endure this.

It’s hard not to resist when we feel uncomfortable and hurt. Sometimes life is tragic, physically and emotionally devastating. How could I possibly accept THIS?

When life is hard, I think the thing we want most of all is peace in mind and heart. To have some ease in the tension. A release of the burden. Respite. We all know we can’t change what is. But, damn it, can’t we just have a little bit of lightness? A breath of sweetness? A tender moment of grace?

My answer is yes, I think it’s possible. In the quiet stillness of another sunrise or with people who care for us or when we dare reach for help and are met with open arms…there in the midst is the ease we thought we’d never know. It feels like God Itself has sent a personal message. Love lives.

Love lives.
Paula

When something goes wrong, have you noticed how quickly we want someone to blame? Surely this catastrophe, whatever it happens to be, must be someone’s fault. My hurt, my anger, my grief, my disgust…is searching for a place to land. He, she, they are the ones who did this. They weren’t careful. He broke the rules. She should have known better. We want someone, anyone, to pay the price.

You know what? Sometimes things just happen. Circumstances and people align in certain ways that result in horrible outcomes. Because, you know what? People are people. We are not perfect. Even when we do our best, things go wrong. Even when we don’t deserve it, hard stuff happens. Even when we are minding our own business, we end up being in the wrong place at the wrong time. So, what now?

All of this calls me to be more kind. It calls me to take more deep breaths and to walk more gently in the world. It calls me to acknowledge my own mistakes…and to realize we all make them. Every-single-one-of-us. Rather than be disappointed about this simple fact, maybe we can let it make us humble. Just maybe we can learn to be loving even in the most trying times.

Why not give it a try?
Paula

Every so often, without any effort by me, a poem comes into my mind. It sweeps in and catches me unaware of the wisdom about to be bestowed. If I pay attention, a full picture emerges.

No one came that day.
I sat still – watching rain fall.
It all became clear.

I love when this happens. Every so often I want to make it happen. I want to sit down and write a poem. Then I remember, it doesn’t work that way. My ‘work’ is to allow it to come. Allow it to unfold. To be open to it and awake enough to receive it.

One duck floating on a choppy pond.
What is she thinking about?
Nothing.

Grateful always
Paula